3 Lessons I Learned as a Rainbow Baby Mom

As I sit here and watch Jameson’s little chest gently rise and fall with each breath, I am brought back to a time when I never thought I would be pregnant, let alone be able to carry a sweet baby to term.

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As I sit here and watch Jameson’s little chest gently rise and fall with each breath, I am brought back to a time when I never thought I would be pregnant, let alone be able to carry a sweet baby to term. (And then there is the anxiety of a successful delivery…that’s a whole other story though – one where a strong cocktail is definitely needed!)

 

Since becoming a rainbow baby mom, there are a few lessons I have learned, lessons that I want to pass along to you lovely ladies.

 

  1. Embrace the 2:00am blowouts

 

Sweet mama, I know you’re tired.

 

Trust me, if I could sleep 12 hours a night a would!

 

And once I began healing from my c-section and caring for Jameson by myself at night (Dustin is an EMT and often had to leave at 2 am for his shift at the station), I began finding myself getting frustrated with Jameson.

 

This sweet little bundle of joy that just had his second blowout of the night (or morning, depending on how you spin it) and was screaming at the top of his tiny lungs…I just looked at him and wished he would sleep through the night.

 

I longed for the warm and comfort of our king sized bed.

 

Of my boobs not hurting and aching to be pumped or nursed every 3 hours.

 

Then it hit me…as I was on my hands and knees scrubbing the poop out of the carpet…again…

 

That after each of my miscarriages I didn’t sleep either.

 

The only difference?

 

It was me crying and not our little miracle in my arms.

 

Yes, the 2:00am blowouts and hunger cries (or cries just because they need their mama) are not the most joyous of occasions, but it’s a heck of a lot better than crying for a sweet baby that left this earth too soon.

 

So pick yourself up off the floor you wonder woman you.

 

You have SO MUCH more in you.

 

You have endured SO MUCH more than this.

 

  1. Don’t let crazy people hold your baby.

 

Okay, so my mother-in-law is not THAT crazy. Nor my mom, my best friend or my husband’s grandparents.

 

But after the sweet nurses rolled Jameson and I into the postpartum room, I thought that everyone that wanted to hold him was a bit on the nutty side.

 

I had just gone through hell and back to not only get and stay pregnant, but labor and delivery was no walk in the park either. And now that I finally had my sweet, healthy prize in my arms, they wanted to HOLD him?

 

Negative ghost rider.

 

Okay, okay…so I wasn’t THAT mean about it. But I definitely made sure that Dustin and I had our own time with Jameson first before anyone was allowed back to hold him.

 

This was one reason why I was thankful I ended up needing a c-section, because we got that sweet hour in the recovery room before the flocks arrived.

 

It was such a sweet time of skin to skin with Jameson and seeing my glowing husband support and love on us both.

 

We were finally a family of three.

 

After this time together we did eventually let others back to see Jameson, but I don’t regret the decision to have people wait to see him one bit. Those first couple hours with your sweet baby should be for you and your husband to bond with your little one.

 

Others can wait just a couple hours.

 

Seeing everyone love on your baby will still be a sweet moment in a little while.

 

  1. The mom guilt is strong – but you’re stronger

 

Every mom experiences mom guilt, it’s inevitable unfortunately. But the mom guilt that comes after finally having your precious rainbow baby is a breed all its own.

 

In Jameson’s first couple weeks of life, I had mastitis not only once, but twice.

 

I could barely walk and take care of myself, let alone a ten day old baby.

 

I felt so awful that I couldn’t take care of my own son that I had tried so hard to have.

But I had to shake that off.

 

My amazing mother kept reminding me that in order to be the best mom for Jameson possible, I needed to first take care of myself.

 

This was the best possible advice that I ever could have gotten.

 

That and she made me sleep for 10 hours straight while recovery from Mastitis…girl I woke up a new woman!

 

Now, it doesn’t matter if you’ve had a rainbow baby or not, everyone experiences mom guilt.

 

But news flash, you not wonder woman!

 

Take care of yourself first so you can be the best mom possible for your baby. And most importantly, stop comparing yourself to others! You’re little one was handpicked just for you, no one could be a better mama to them than you.

 

You best believe it!

 

So, to recap:

 

  1. Embrace the 2:00am blow outs
  2. Don’t let crazy people hold your baby
  3. The mom guilt is strong – but you’re stronger

 

I would love to hear what other lessons you have learned as a Rainbow Baby Mom. Drop your replies in the comments below!

 

And don’t forget to join our newsletter for freebies and insider content weekly!

 

Stay strong sweet mama,

 

XOXO

Ashlee

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